


Dangerously Cute

by The_Glittery_Hedgehog_Ninja



Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Dimension, Arrancar, Bats, Bickering, Cats, Chibi, Espada, Gen, Hueco Mundo Arc, Humor, Idiots, Murciélago - Freeform, Pantera - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-27
Updated: 2016-10-27
Packaged: 2018-08-27 06:41:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8391178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Glittery_Hedgehog_Ninja/pseuds/The_Glittery_Hedgehog_Ninja
Summary: After Grimmjow steals a faulty Caja Negación from Starkk, he uses it on Ulquiorra as revenge (for God knows what) and, as expected, the Cuatro Espada is exiled away to another dimension—but Grimmjow doesn't expect to get swept along with him. Somehow, the pair find themselves trapped in a world of chibis, but that doesn't explain why they're transformed into chibis too . . . or why the two feel as if they need to act like them as well.Grimmjow now likes to cuddle with cute cats and thinks "fuck" is a heinously bad word, and Ulquiorra now believes watching the birth of newborn bats to be the ultimate pastime and thinks eating must be a choice—no one should force anyone to intake food.  What the hell is happening, and how in the world are they going to get back to Hueco Mundo?





	

"That was a very stupid move."

Grimmjow glared and bore his teeth at his opponent. He tried to edge his blade from the locking pressure that had forced it to stay put by the other blade. "Shut the hell up, Ulquiorra. What the fuck do you know?"

Not answering, Ulquiorra hardly blinked as he ground Murciélago's blade deeper into Pantera's, his hand barely straining by the force—and he as just using one of his hands. There was no need to use two yet.

He'd yet to ask why Grimmjow had challenged him to this duel—he was the Cuatro Espada and the latter was the Sexta—proving his strength was pointless as their placements already declared the strongest—so there was no reason for this tournament if it was to test power. Ulquiorra hadn't even responded to Grimmjow goading him into this fight and had only drawn his blade to prove his point after he'd dodged the Sexta's Gran Rey Cero—which he wasn't even supposed to _use_ inside the walls of Las Noches.

"My knowledge far exceeds yours, Grimmjow." Ulquiorra's voice remained monotone. "And the fact that driving your sword into mine headfirst was a very stupid move was completely obvious." He pressed more on Pantera's blade, the force exerted nearly bending Grimmjow's much-enduring Zanpakutō.

Yanking his sword away and dodging as inertia drove the pressure Ulquiorra had put on his own Zanpakutō—which would have driven straight into his chest—Grimmjow muttered, "Well, aren't we talkative today?"

Ulquiorra barely flinched as he resheathed his sword and dodged Grimmjow's next blow simultaneously. Ignoring his opponent's previous comment, he swiftly voiced, "This duel is pointless. I will be leaving," and turned to walk away, shoving his hands deep into his coat pockets.

He heard a growl from behind him and quickly used his Sonído to dodge to the left. Had he lingered a second longer, and Grimmjow's Zanpakutō would have severed him clean in half. He stared blankly as the Sexta Espada materialized in front of him, looking none too happy.

Grimmjow aimed Pantera at Ulquiorra's sternum. "Where do you think you're going?"

The Cuatro Espada merely sidestepped him and continued moving forward. "That is none of your concern," he muttered.

"You sure as fucking hell bet it's my concern," Grimmjow griped, his mouth sprouting a madman-like grin. "I'm not done fighting with you yet. Are you that much of a wimp to walk away from a fight?"

Ulquiorra didn't even make the motion of turning around and continued to move forward. His bootsteps echoed through the numerous halls of Las Noches for a time before he heard the telltale sound of a Sonído once again. Sighing, he made no movement as he allowed Grimmjow to clasp his throat and pin him to the wall. Although he never would admit it, he was curious as to what the hell was wrong with the Sexta.

" _You_ ," Grimmjow breathed, his cerulean eyes masked in anger. He tightened his grip on Ulquiorra's throat.

Ulquiorra stared at him half-liddedly. The vise around his throat didn't faze him; he could break free at any moment, but he chose to stay. "I don't intend to humor you. What is it that you want, Grimmjow." He didn't even bother to initiate that his words composed a question.

A predatory growl escaped Grimmjow's lungs, and he unsheathed Pantera, aiming for the hierro-covered throat that belonged to his opponent, only to have Ulquiorra Sonído out of his grasp at the last second.

"You know what I want, dumbass," he griped as he slashed skillfully at Ulquiorra, who only rose a few feet above him and pointed his index finger at the blue-haired Espada's forehead.

Without a trace of emotion, the Cuatro muttered, "Cero," and a bright green flash was emitted from his finger, hurtling straight at Grimmjow.

Grimmjow huffed as he sidestepped just in time. He growled and gripped Pantera's hilt even tighter. "Oh, so you wanna play _that_ way, huh?" His eyes became slanted and a sadistically excited grin made its way to his face. Fishing something out of the belt of his hakama, he turned to Ulquiorra. He then held up a small, dark purple cube.

Ulquiorra's eyes widened a bit when he saw the object, but as usual, he remained enigmatic. "A Caja Negación . . . where did you get it?"

Grimmjow smirked and rolled it in his fingers carelessly, like a die. "Seems, familiar, huh? Stole it. From Starkk."

The dark-haired Espada edged a bit further away from Grimmjow. "If you think you can spirit me away to another dimension again, you are sorely mistaken."

"Tch. More like _you're_ the one who's sorely mistaken, asshole," Grimmjow growled, swiping his Zanpakutō across the upper part of Ulquiorra's coat, trying to get to his Hollow hole.

Quickly, Ulquiorra Sonído-ed behind Grimmjow, lining his position to fire another Cero at the back of Grimmjow's head. "Last time you caught me off guard. It will not happen again this time."

Ignoring him, Grimmjow turned his head and grinned evilly, expertly dodging the Cero Ulquiorra fired. He edged towards the Cuatro, taunting him by waving the Caja Negación freely in his fingers. "Who said it won't?"

This time, Ulquiorra's Cero caught him in the cheek, and Grimmjow doubled over for a moment, his face contorting for a millisecond in pain. He glared daggers at his opponent and noticed him looking at him calculatingly as he wiped the dark red blood off of his face.

"Come another step closer, and I will gouge out your heart and make you eat it," Ulquiorra warned, already conjuring up another Cero—this time a Gran Rey (even though it was forbidden inside Las Noches—who knew Ulquiorra even knew _how_ to break the rules), using blood from a small incision he'd made himself with Murciélago earlier. His voice was monotone as ever.

His eyes burning furiously, Grimmjow swiped Pantera at his opponent—his own Grand Rey Cero forming in the same hand, in which his fingers were bloodied by touching his wounded face.

At the same time, they both commanded, "Gran Rey Cero," and twin blasts of blue and green spirit energy hurtled out of their fingers, their sheer powers aimed at the same time in opposite directions, effectively canceling each other out, and possibly destroying both parties.

Or so it should have happened.

Instead of firing his own Gran Rey Cero (faking it instead), Grimmjow waited until the very last second until Ulquiorra had fired his own, pivoting to the left as the green blast incinerated the spot he had just been standing in. As Ulquiorra concentrated on where Grimmjow had last been standing and aiming his Grand Rey, Grimmjow used his Sonído to propel himself to where his opponent was and quickly pulled back his coat, exposing his Hollow hole. Smirking to himself, Grimmjow dropped the Caja Negación into the empty hole and watched as Ulquiorra's eyes widened in surprise.

Just as quickly, his green irises returned to being half-lidded and as he began to fade away. He murmured, "D—damn, you."

 _That's right_ , Grimmjow grinned. _Even if it's just for a few hours_ , _it's still part of the payback—'specially since it annoys him so fucking much. Yeah. This is perfect._

He ignored the stings of the pain inflicted on his cheek and turned to walk away, hellbent on finding more prey until he realized . . . he couldn't feel his legs. Looking down, he perceived that where his legs should have been, there was only air. Grimmjow's eyes widened as he realized more and more of him was disappearing . . . he was fading away.

"What the fucking hell is happening?" he growled, watching as his torso inchingly became invisible. He reached down to feel his chest, but his arm went straight through as if there was nothing solid anymore—but then he realized he had no arms. "What the hell? That Caja Negación was supposed to only work on one Arrancar!"

Suddenly, he realized where he had gotten that Caja Negación from—and whose fault it was that he'd obtained a malfunctioning object. His cheeks turning red in fury, his voice echoed along the hallways of Las Noches; his head became fully transparent as he called, " _Starkk_!"

And then he blinked out of Hueco Mundo and the dimension altogether.

**Author's Note:**

> As for why Grimmjow believes Ulquiorra wronged him, you'll have to find out in a later chapter . . .
> 
> Until then, please comment and/or bookmark if you liked! :)


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